I'm holed up in our back sewing room, finishing some Christmas gifts. I took a few hours off today to do so, and Boy doesn't know I'm home. He's clomping around the first floor in high heels from his costume collection, announcing "Mama's coming!" clomp clomp clomp.
At some point, Nanny helped him procure a "baby," and he's been clomping around feeding it, putting it down for a nap, and strapping it in a car seat, punctuating each activity with "Mama's coming!" clomp clomp clomp.
This interpretation of mama is a marked improvement over a recent dress-up episode. Boy was donning heels and a necklace and declared, "Watch out! Mama's coming!"
Me: "Oh yeah? What does Mommy say?"
Boy: "'Bye bye!'"
Me: [picks pieces of heart off the floor]
I like to think I'm not alone as an often exasperated mother of a preschooler (and now, of a preschooler and a toddler...aiyeeeee!). There are nights when I review the events of the day and am embarrassed by the sheer number of arguments I had with a three year old. Worst of all, some of my most unflattering Mom Moments are regurgitated back at me by said three year old. I was ordered to "Move it!" off his bed one night when he wanted to make a point and I was blocking his way. Of late he is particularly fond of some variation on one of my perennial favorites: "I'm serious!"
I am serious, Mommy.
Or the especially charming:
I am serious at you, Mommy!
I fear that any moment now he is going to spit out one of my more common expressions of utter exasperation: "I'm sick of you [fill in frustrating behavior here]!" That will get a wince or twelve out of me, and possibly an accusatory look from Husband.
So I suppose it's not shocking that he also thinks of "Bye bye!" when he thinks of me. He hears that a lot. After all, "You're driving me bonkers!" would be a lot worse.